I have no clue wtf is going on

Un the last 20 minutes I have been bombarded with so many lies and so much drama about someone named Matthew and my eldest daughter and Brian that I fucking am losing my god damn mind. It would have been nice to be able to talk to ANYONE  in person to be able to figure out what is actually happening. 

There are so many different voices. Some belonging to my family (who tell me i am crazy or to check myself in then, this ZZZ way tell me its all fake) some to John's family some, to law enforcement.  

I have no clue what to do. How to make this stop. How to understand why even though I am doing everything humanly possible to get y life back in order, things are getting worse. There isn't anything else i amgoung to be able to do to make these people happy.  They are never going to allow me a life that is one where I can trust or, love or, feel safe or comfortable.  

My kids are used every single day to hurt me.. There is very little I can do while I get told how there are so many people on my side. Really?! Where are they?

The two people that I thought were helping me have turned so completely I on me that I hope I never see them again! 

Each time I compliment or, say anything nice it causes more problems.

I get told to kill myself, even by the person I thought was my best friend.  Guess not. Everything is always my fault for not being stronger than the abuse or the abusers. Told how they had to do this or they had to do that 

I dont know what the fuck the point is. I get so hurt but even my own mother still won't tell me anything. 

I am sick of people admitting they know I am missing chunks of time then being called a liar! Called a child molester every day. Why can't anyone do anything except blame me? They are domestic terrorists.  They admit to killing people but, i guess its too difficult to stop them. It's just pathetic.

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