This is Sick

 My heart is broken

 "Do you want him or, do you want your son?' I chose John, like they tell me to. I don't really know what to believe about someone else, I thought a lot of things. The y keep demanding I tell them the truth but, I have told the truth 

John pretends he can't hear any of this and, then uses all of this to pick fights. Last night John and, I had a terrible fight. It is 200% my fault. It always is though. I can't handle being tortured anymore. It has all become too much and, they will never stop.

I am losing my fucking mind. My heart just can't take anymore. They continue to use my children to destroy my world and, there is only so much one person can take. 

I loved John but, I was never good enough. I am sick of hearing how he is cheating on me, I am sick of him lying to me. I am sick of being set up time and, time again.

I never understand what is going on and, I cant take the stress anymore. 

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