I Am Too Stupid

 I just am done with every part of being alive. I can't handle all of this and, I no longer want to try to figure it out. Apparently, it is ok to torture someone to death. 

I have tried to understand why people didn't want to sit me down and, talk to me like I was a person. I have tried to understand the things that they tell me. It is difficult when one minute things are one way and, the next they are a different way. I have nobody I can ask for help. It is hard to understand who to ask when I get told how much everyone hates me.

Since they use every voice and, I have no way of knowing if someone is who they say they are or, if they feel the way I am told, I can't handle any more. I am ready to have the torture end. Everything I have tried has been the wrong thing and, I am sorry that I wasn't ever good enough.

I can't deal with this anymore. I am sorry. I just can't. I tried to be perfect and, I couldn't.

I love my kids and, I am not the person they say I am. Please try to understand, I needed to have people help me figure out what the fuck was happening.

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