I Miss My Life

I miss so many things about life. Happiness. Normal people. Knowing what is going on in my own life. 

I miss my kids more than people know and, I am afraid of all accusations that they keep throwing at me. I don't know how to connect with them anymore. They are being hurt too and, I am just tired of all of this 

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This Will Never End

I did nothing to any of these people. I amnso sick of my head being so fucked with that I can't take anymore. I have never been more hurt or, humiliated. Treated like shit so badly that I can't handle it anymore. I hate being alive. I hate every single day. I am too worthless for my own mother to want to tell me the fucking truth. I am sick of hearing things like I wanted to be raped or, how happy they are to have raped me or, how someone gave their son a high five after he raped me. I can't take anymore. Anytime I try to believe that someone might believe me, they start to hurt me too.  I am nothing like they say i am. I am not abusive or, a child molester.  They admit every day the things they have done yet, I still am hated and, take the blame for all of it. Told to trust someone who abused me worse than anyone else did. I can't believe that they abuse me and, say whatever they want and if I say anything back, I am the problem. I am always the bad guy. Even people he...
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